When I was a teenager, my high-school principal, a God-fearing Christian man (he didn’t judge or condemn those who held different thoughts and beliefs than he did as far as I know), sat me down and had a talk with me. God knows why he liked me. I was an utter mess and not always very nice, and he’d pulled me into his office one afternoon because he thought I was going through “something.” Instead of punishing me, he taught me the phrase and the meaning behind the words “And this too shall pass.”
Who knows why I was in trouble. I don’t even remember why he taught me this phrase. Maybe he was hoping that whatever I was going through “would pass” sooner rather than later if he planted that seed into my head. Sometimes you just learn something and that sticks with you even if you don’t remember the reason why you learned it in the first place…as one does.
WHAT THIS MEANS TO ME
That phrase fascinated me…the meaning behind the words…”this too shall pass.” It reminds me to remember that however bad it gets (sometimes it gets really, really bad), it will get better at some point in the future. (The fact that it might not be in my lifetime before it gets better…that is something to consider…I mean the saying doesn’t say when!) In good times, it reminds me to fully enjoy those wonderful moments because they won’t last forever either.
In my life, this phrase has helped me get through a lot. Still does. I share it when I feel it’s appropriate.
WHERE DOES IT COME FROM?
“This too shall pass,” has been attributed to different cultures and faiths. However, I’m not going to research and hunt down the very first time this phrase was uttered or emblazoned on a ring or written in a script. Someone else can do that. I’m going to give credit to my principal who taught this to me in a moment of my crisis and his kindness.
Thank you, kind sir, wherever you are!
IN RESPONSE TO ANOTHER BLOGGER
The reason I bring this up is because I offered this phrase as part of my larger response to a blogger’s question on a different blog. The blogger had asked,
Why do some people ask how you are and then when you tell them, instead of just acknowledging with empathy how you’re feeling (if you’re going through a difficult time), that person tries to put some kind of positive spin on what you said? It feels dismissive and like they don’t understand what you’re going through as a human being; that they aren’t hearing what you are saying.
So, I just paraphrased this blogger’s question. Out of respect for her and her blog, I’ll keep her out of it…because this blogger is freaking awesome, asks the most thought-provoking questions, and my life is so much better and richer for her blogging. I’m writing about what happened to me on her comment section by someone else, not her; and of course, I’m not looking to create any kind of trouble here or on her blog.
Also, while I don’t think anyone would…sometimes what I think and what people do are two different things. I would NEVER want someone to look someone else up and say anything negative because of what I’m writing. That’s not the point of why I’m writing this. I’ve already handled the situation. So please…thank you if you feel for me (if you do), but I want this to end after this post. I do hope you understand.
A RESPONSE TO MY RESPONSE FROM ANOTHER RESPONDER
So I wrote my response to this awesome blogger to try and answer her question in my own long-winded way (sorry, blogger friend); and then one of her readers took it upon herself to respond to me as in, “Hey Wayward,” or however she stated it to get my attention. This reader then proceeded to tell what “This too shall pass” meant to her in the past and present.
She also said she was going through a difficult time and explained how (and yeah, definitely a difficult time) and she worked herself up into a rant, which I think was very good for her because she got a bunch of her frustration out of her system. I think the phrase, “This too shall pass,” was the impetus for her response.
I took issue with what this commenter suggested I’d said and meant about things I didn’t say or mean to my/our blogger friend. It was weird because what she appeared to be accusing me of was actually the opposite of what I said and meant. I went back and re-read my comment a couple of times to see if I’d made any mistakes or typos. I hadn’t. Why she was suggesting I’d said things such as, I was telling people to feel better or smile when they didn’t feel like it…or some such nonsense, I haven’t a clue. I kind of called her out when I asked, “Where did you get that I said any of those things? Apparently, I didn’t make myself clear.”
Obviously, she doesn’t know me or she wouldn’t have made those remarks. I’m not sure if she’d even read my full response. Ugh! I did tell her I was glad she was able to get her thoughts out; that was important. I knew she was going through a trying time; but hey, so was I and clearly, this blogger, whose site we were on, was going through a hard time as well.
She responded back (again, I paraphrase) by telling me that I shouldn’t take what she said personally; that what she wrote wasn’t meant to be personal. The woman stated that she was not feeling well when she wrote it and she was triggered by the phrase. She admitted that she couldn’t blame me for something that she said came from King Solomon. Then she ended with an “Lol.”
Whatever. I dropped it.
TALK ABOUT TIMING!
So today, my friend Lilibeth texted me without even knowing about the interaction I’d had the day before with the commenter. Ack!!!! —
My friend Lilibeth sent me the above because we’d been discussing earlier in the week some of the things people have said to us throughout the years that have been mind boggling. Some of these words were mean, hurtful, dismissive and even downright cruel. Some were complete falsehoods. The questions and speculations about who, what and why people say these things came up in our conversation. We were discussing this because this ties into what I’m currently writing about in my book. (Will my book ever get finished??!!!!) Anyway, Lilibeth thought this blurb/comment was helpful; and she sent this along with her thoughts that when she’s kind to those who aren’t, it made her feel better.
Okay. I can see that.
DIFFERENT PEOPLE, DIFFERENT EXPERIENCES
Our back-and-forth conversation through text was interesting. I told Lilibeth I’d tried to set the record straight with this commenter, but I was nice about it. However, I really didn’t like this woman’s comeback to me. I thought the woman was out-of-line and she should have apologized.
Lilibeth thought I should just let it go.
OH, THE IRONY!
I thought, well, yeah, I thought I did; except I re-thought about it after Lilibeth sent me this blurb/comment (don’t know where she found it), and that brought yesterday’s interaction back to mind. It’s not that Lilibeth was trying to bring up something annoying. She didn’t even know anything had happened. We’d just had different experiences. However, I like irony and this commenter provided it when —
On one hand, she’d suggested that I shouldn’t tell others how to feel, but on the other hand, isn’t that what she’d just done to me in her second response when she’d said that I shouldn’t take it personally? Doesn’t that equate that I shouldn’t let it bother me because she hadn’t intended what she wrote to me…even though she addressed it as though it were? As if telling others “how to feel” was my point of view and what I was doing in my comment — even though I’m not, I wouldn’t, I didn’t?!!! WTF, lady? I mean, how would she feel if someone did that to her?
Apparently, this woman also thinks I can read her mind and figure out what she means rather than what she actually wrote. No thank you. And just out of curiosity, are others who read her comment also supposed to be mind readers?
Irony, though…gotta love it.
I agree with the commenter that one shouldn’t tell others how to feel. Hell, I spent a lot of money getting an education to become a therapist (not that this commenter knew that), and that’s like Rule #1 you learn when getting your master’s in counseling. So I kind of bring that to the table wherever I am (usually) — not to tell people how to feel. Anyway, when I’m on someone else’s blog, the fact that I have a therapist’s academic background isn’t usually known or anyone’s business. That info’s relevant now only to address the fact of why I wouldn’t tell someone else how to feel — if I didn’t just intuitively know that to begin with, then I certainly learned it through training.
If the commenter’s second response was simply something along the lines of, “Let me apologize. I addressed this to you and I shouldn’t have done that. I was triggered by ‘This too shall pass’, and what I wrote came out the wrong way. I’m so sorry,” there wouldn’t be an issue.
If she’d said anything like that, then my thoughts would have been — hey, no harm done. You had a moment. It happens to us all. It’s all good on my end.
But she didn’t.
She might be very nice to most people, but that didn’t come across to me. From what I got out of our exchange, she didn’t show any empathy, manners or accountability for what she wrote and did…and didn’t do.
Break the cycle? Sure. Of course. But sometimes, I don’t think the cycle breaks with everyone.
TOO MUCH, TOO LITTLE OR JUST RIGHT?
I think Lilibeth thinks I’m making too much out of this, but I told Lilibeth that I pay attention to what people write, what they say, how they say it and what they don’t say, along with their attitude and their body language. Gift or curse? Whatever it is doesn’t make me ultra-sensitive. It makes me attentive. Call it my counselor training at work.
And yea, I could read into what the commenter said as an apology without the words “apology” or “I’m sorry” actually stated. Usually, though, when a person states something that way, it’s because they want to look like they’re apologizing when they’re really not. She didn’t say she screwed up or that she was sorry. She made excuses and then, apparently, assumed that I’d just understand. You know what they say about “assume” don’t you?
Anyway, I can count on three fingers at the moment when I’ve had three different people say or write or do some kind of bullshit that makes me think, WTF? Why would you say, do or think that towards me or about me? And that’s just within the last month! Nary an apology from any of them. Also, just so everyone knows, whatever negative thing you think about me, it’s really none of my business and I don’t need to know. That’s also referred to as, “If you don’t tell me what you really think about me, I won’t tell you what I really think about you!” LOL. 🙂
So I have several questions for y’all, à la my blogger friend who poses the best questions ever. I probably need to work on my questions, but please answer whatever strikes your fancy…or bring up something else…if you wanna. Here goes —
- What do you think about the “hurt people, hurt people” blurb/comment that Lilibeth texted me? Do you agree or disagree with this and why?
- Are there any exceptions to what you think about this?
- How do you deal with people who do and say stupid shit that’s intended toward you? I presume most if not all of us have had this happen. If not, dear God, how did you get out of that in life? Please let me rub your belly for good luck, ‘k?
- If you don’t do anything at all when someone says something shitty to you, is there a reason for that? (Of course there is. I’d love to hear it because I want all sides to this!)
- If you don’t let it get to you or it just doesn’t bother you, how do you do this exactly? Do you spin it? Do you think about it in a different way? Please tell me how you do this…if you’d be so kind.
- Do you think that people who apologize without using the words “I’m sorry” or “I apologize” really mean it or are they just cleverly trying to get out of their situation when they were called out?
Silly me, I think rude behavior is getting worse as the 21st Century moves forward. I’m probably old-fashioned because I think that when you wrong someone, even slight someone, you should apologize using the words “I’m sorry or I apologize”…and I get that when lawsuits get involved, parties are supposed to refrain from saying anything and you’re never supposed to admit guilt or apologize…but that’s not what I’m talking about here. I’m talking about when someone just says/writes something shitty to you or “aggrieves” you, even if they are feeling bad, having a bad day, whatever excuse they have — once they realize what they’ve done, shouldn’t they apologize? If not, why not?
Okay, also, whatever else you have to add to this dialogue, please do. I’m listening…
YEAH, I KNOW…GO AHEAD, SAY IT ANYWAY
Also, okay, I have to say it because it’s just begging to be said: I know all of this will pass, but in the meantime…let’s make hay out of this while the sun/moon doth shine…I’d love to hear your thoughts.
Love you all and sparkle on in your own badass ways, my Wayward Friends!
PS — Oh, also, in case you don’t know this already — I’m not a counselor/therapist. I went through the entire graduate-level schooling and graduated, but then I decided to write a damned book instead. So I’m not licensed. I did go through two practicums while in school, so I have worked with clients in the past…but until you’re licensed and go through an even longer internship, yeah…not a bonafide therapist…at least not in Texas. Geez, I hope my book pays off!
And Music — because we all need music…well, I need music…
If I could I’d buy each of you a coke…if you wanted it!
And not exactly what I had in mind, but what the hell, I haven’t played this before and I like Skynyrd, so…
Lastly, with all apologies…or not.
For those of you who would like to comment but don’t seem to be able to on my site —
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21 thoughts on ““This Too Shall Pass””
Wow, where do I even start? All I know is, I COMPLETELY understand what you felt with that commenter and what they perceived about what you wrote. When someone misinterprets something someone else’s writes or said, it can be a clusterfuck of emotions. You reacted the way anyone else would, it’s not like what you were feeling is wrong. It’s very justifiable because someone you don’t know starts telling you what you should or shouldn’t write/say, taking every word out of context. Because after all, that’s what stupid people do. I felt particularly drawn to every word of this post because I have to defend myself everyday because some stupid person at work will twist my emails, phone calls or interactions and perceive that I’m the bad person. This person that does this is my very own boss. She turned out to be a real life Jekyll and Hyde, and I’m so sick of it because I’m the one that gets told how to act when assholes I work with treat ME like shit and I defend myself because, as she put it once, “your a representation of me and you should act like it.” Yeah that’s total bullshit because it’s okay for others under her to treat me like shit, but I can’t defend myself verbally because Im the one that isn’t acting “according to my position.” When people like us try to be “nice” even when it’s hard for us to do so, it’s emotionally draining. For me, it’s because I find it hard to ignore my moral compass when someone like my boss should defend me instead of the assholes that treat me bad and assume it’s always my fault even when it’s not. Being nice sometimes doesn’t cut it, sometimes it takes getting mad and showing someone that we’re not anyone’s whipping post whether it be verbal or written to shut them the fuck up. Or at least realize that maybe they need to take a long look in the mirror to realize that’s it’s not us, it’s them.
What you felt was totally normal, and I do believe that, yes, this too shall pass. As always Mona, don’t ever stop being you! 😎😁😇
I don’t know how you deal with the stress and the ridiculousness at your workplace. I know you were hoping this position would be much better than the last one. In your current situation, I think it would be difficult for me to know which boss I was dealing with, Jekyll or Hyde, at any given moment. How disappointing this boss has turned out to be. Ugh! I’m with you, toxic people will leave you feeling emotionally drained. As you said, “Total bullshit!” I hate that you’re having to deal with all of that! Thanks for your support, my friend! Please know you have my support as well! Hugs, Mona
Toxic people just love to make you wonder about stupid shit like whether your own words are taken out of context. No matter what you tried to convey, these with only two brain cells will make it about them. I’m trying to survive here, I have to I just bought a house, until something else comes along that is. I hate having to work with someone that actually comes off as bipolar because of her indecisive nature and ass kissing ways. When the reporting structure changed, I asked her why she was okay with it. Her answer? She didn’t want to step on any toes, and I’m like, you outrank this dumb bitch, if she had said she wasn’t okay with it, Fake Supervisor would have let it go. I’m so tired of having to deal with these two inept and hypocritical bitches, seriously ugh.
So there are limitations on what my program will let me add to the comment section include copying and pasting comic strips, apparently. So I copied and pasted the Far Side comic strip that I would have put here, but instead, had to put after the “commenting issue” section at the end of my post above. I don’t know why there are jerks/assholes/bosses who gotta be that way, etc. in the world, but the comic strip seems to be as good of an explanation as any! I hope a better opportunity comes your way soon that pays more money and actually allows you to work with decent human beings. I know I’d want extra compensation just for the cost of the therapy I’d need (at least twice a week) to be able to put up with this!
Ha! I saw it’s God must have thought we needed a good supply of jerks to make our blood pressure go sky high. Because that’s how I feel every time I deal with these people. Thanks for the laugh my friend, it was much needed 😝
I’m sorry that happened to you. I personally like the saying, and if I was having a hard time and someone said it to me, I would find it comforting to be reminded of that. Maybe the commenter is hurting, but she doesn’t get to hurt other people, especially by blindsiding someone she doesn’t even knw. If she didn’t like your comment, she should have just ignored it!
Thanks for your support, my friend! Some people, huh? I agree with what you said. Blindsided is exactly how I felt! I think some people don’t realize that manners actually matter! Such is life, though. Mona
1. Yes. Sometimes that is the case but not always. It depends on the person and various other factors.
2. See #1.
3. Honestly? It depends on my current state of mind. I’d like to think, generally, when dealing with strangers on the internet, I’d let it go. But then again…it would depend on what exactly was said and my current mood.
4. If I do nothing, it’s generally because a) I’m not great with confrontation (it’s debatable whether or not this is a good thing) b) if it’s an internet interaction, it’s probably because I assume this person is either a troll (thus is looking for a fight) and/or having a bad day.
5. These kinds of things plague me…until something else comes along to occupy my mind.
6. I try to look at all the angles…
7. People should always use the words “I’m sorry” or “I apologize”. But, I think some people automatically go on the defensive when they are called out – this doesn’t excuse the behavior but can be the reason they respond in such a way.
Thanks for tackling the questions. I really appreciate your honesty and perspective. You’re right that some people automatically go on the defensive when they are called out. I hope I wasn’t too aggressive when I said, “Where did you find that I said…” to the woman. In hindsight, I may have actually put her on the defensive, though I wasn’t trying…and I felt put on the defensive; but what you said makes sense. Huh, thanks for pointing that out to me. This is why I love y’all. Y’all see things and totally get things when I miss them. Thanks for bearing with me on this. I’m hoping to write a much different post next time! Have a great week ahead, my friend! Mona
Hmmm…as I know who wrote the original blog….😆 I’m going to keep my responses flat…crappy apologies are just that…crappy and dismissive…there’s no excuse for not just saying you screwed up. Im a big believer in heartfelt, true apologies, and I’ve given a number of them in the past.
I’m never sure when to turn the other cheek and when to actually say something…I have a post in the pipeline about this…and I wish I had a better answer to that question…my father in law says some pretty insensitive things, and I always wonder whether to rock the boat or not, because it’s not my father…I know I’m not really answering your questions…but I guess I’m just not sure. But xoxo
Yes, I have seen your comments on this blogger’s site before. Isn’t she amazing? I agree with you that crappy, dismissive apologies…well, they’re ridiculous…a waste of breath and words, really. As the saying goes, it is what it is…but when someone does something like that, it does make one raise an eyebrow…or write a full blog post. 🙃 About your FIL who can be insensitive…you’ve been married a few years…lots of family dynamics there. I guess my questions are, do his comments rankle you everytime you’re around him and are you around him often enough that it’s impacting your life…do you have some understanding between the two of you…if you won’t do X, then I won’t do Y, but if you do X, then I will do Y; and of course, the big question, where and how does your husband figure into this? As I’m sure you know there’s a lot of variables, personalities
to consider, family rules and trial and error in coming up with a more comfortable way of interacting…or in accepting “he who will not change” in a way that’s less impactful to you and that gives you the respect and, if this applies, the emotional protection you deserve. An in-law once was incredibly rude to me…racist, actually. For whatever reason, he was hoping to draw me into an argument with him. I didn’t react the way he thought I would. I refused to go there with him. Kind of pissed him off. He told me, “Oh Mona, you’re so…nice.” He wasn’t complimenting me. He was being an asshole. He’s now a dead asshole. Others may miss him, but not me. (I didn’t kill him, btw! Thought I should just clarify that! 😂🤣😂) My response to him at the time was (not using his real name), “Oh, Ron, and you’re so……YOU!” I used the exact tone of voice he used with me. I rolled my eyes and walked away from him. Never had any trouble with him after that. I hope that inspires you in creatively dealing with your FIL situation. I’m looking forward to reading the post in the pipeline of which you speak. Thanks for your thoughts here. I’ll catch you on the flipside, my friend! Hugs, Mona
I think, for the most part, none of us are trying to put someone on the defensive. Truth be told, we are dealing with words on a screen, and not face to face, which can be interpreted a million different ways; which all include what we are dealing with/feeling at that given moment. That being said, when you call someone out after they hurt you, they should apologize. Properly. Period.
You make an excellent point about how easy it is to miscommunicate or misinterpret. I find it interesting how one has to formulate a thought and through words, writing, body language, etc., try to effectively communicate that thought to a receiver, who then has to process all of the incoming information and, hopefully, interpret what the sender is trying to relay correctly. While I can’t know for sure, you may have hit the nail on the head and the commenter may have felt defensive when she answered. I won’t know for sure, but it would make sense. I do know she appeared to have a lot going on. It’s amazing how many people aren’t for sure why they’re doing or saying something…I’m 99.9 percent sure that she’s very aware that she was in the wrong here, though.
The fact that all of these different facets of this same issue keeps crossing my path over the last week, that’s what made me want to address this in a post.
I agree with you, manners matter and if you know you’ve “done someone wrong,” you should apologize, not half-assed, but as you put it, “properly.” I won’t hold my breath, in getting one from the commenter, though. Again, thank you, Gigi, for adding so much to this…and your support!
Do you have any specific situation in your own life that you’d like to share? That’s made you scratch your head? M
The first time I heard the phrase “hurt people hurt people” was on TV. I thought it was simple and true. The TV show (was it Doctor Who? I don’t remember) had a psychopath happily interpret it as “hurt people. Hurt people.” Which has forever ruined it as a joke in my head, lol.
I have a couple of coping mechanisms for drama… some good, some bad…
I don’t interact with a whole lot of people. If it’s some Internet random, I swallow the bile and do not engage, because it’s a fight that everyone loses, and will only produce more bile. I used to engage, and quickly learned that it was stupid and futile and toxic.
I always believe the best of people. “This too shall pass” is good, but this one is better for me; I live by it and say it to everyone: “Never attribute to malice what can be explained by stupidity.” Most of the time, I really believe it’s ignorance, which to me is forgivable. That lady may not have realized she was hurting your feelings. All I know is, every time I’ve hurt somebody else’s feelings, it was out of ignorance, and I had no idea I was doing it. Unless it is my boyfriend. That poor guy. And even in his case, it’s not a conscious attempt to hurt; it’s an uncoscious lashing out, a case of “hurt people hurt people.”
I don’t let a lot of people in deep enough to hurt me. So that’s probably not great, but it works. If it’s somebody I really care about who hurt my feelings, I probably wouldn’t tell them, lest they feel bad for hurting my feelings. So that’s not great either. I’m working on that one.
If it’s some road rager, etc., I usually pity them, because the lives they live are their own punishment.
I know. When I first read “Hurt people, hurt people”…well, I’m not sure there should be a comma in there at all because it’s a sentence that starts with an adjective, then noun, then verb and then direct object. (I think.) It almost feels like when you break down the word “psychotherapist,” you could look at it as, “Psycho the rapist.” So I could see how a psycho might misinterpret “hurt people, hurt people” as two direct orders to hurt people; and if he is psycho the rapist…yeah, that could be really bad. However, as long as we’re not actually eating Grandma when we call her for dinner, I guess it’s all copacetic. Okay, I’m having way too much fun here on such a dark subject…
Seriously, I love your “Never attribute to malice what can be explained by stupidity,” saying. I so needed that and now I have it imprinted in my brain. Thank you. Sometimes you are wise beyond your years, Sarah! 🙂 Have a great week my friend!
My take… Hurt people do hurt but they’re aren’t the only ones. There are people that can only feel good about themselves if they are bringing others down. My response is usually sarcastic humor that gets the person unable to respond without looking dumb. When all else fails, I use a trick I learned from The Blogges. I just respond to the comment with “Is that you Mom?”
My friend, you’re right that there are people like that. I think they have some really bad narcissistic tendencies…whether their mothers had anything to do with helping to mold them into the uhm…jerks…they’ve become…maybe, maybe not. Also, I’d love an example of how you use your sarcastic humor to put someone in their place so if they say anything at all, they look dumb. That’s a genius move! Note to self: work on sarcastic skills! LOL. 🙂 Have a great week my friend! I’ll see you on your blog next. 🙂 Mona
There’s absolutely nothing wrong with giving something that’s hurt you so much thought. In fact I think giving a great deal of thought to another person’s actions that hurt us can help us grow and be better people ourselves. That would be my response to Lilibeth if she thinks you’re giving this too much thought. And maybe in the same situation Lilibeth wouldn’t give it that much thought, which I think is fine too. Different people process things in different ways. So…
1. Yes, I agree that hurt people hurt people. I’m going to paraphrase Henry Miller who said kind-hearted people are the ones who become externally cold and apathetic because it’s the only way they can protect themselves. When people think they’re going to be hurt I understand the impulse to strike first.
2. Yes, there are exceptions because, well, see “Different people process things in different ways,” and I’ll probably refer to that a lot.
3. How I deal with people who say stupid shit about me varies based on the situation but I’ve cut people out of my life rather than put up with their insults, admittedly after learning the hard way that there was nothing I could do to make them stop.
4. Sometimes I don’t do anything when someone says something shitty to me. Well, that’s not entirely true. I walk away seething and do my best to let it go, which ain’t always easy, but I try to pick my battles carefully.
5. How I let things go varies but I find that focusing on something completely unrelated helps. I go watch a TV show that makes me laugh, or read something, or spend time doing something else. Sure, sometimes it’s hard to let go, and seemingly random memories will pop up and make me feel bad, but time wounds all heels, and when your heel hurts it’s hard to think about other stuff.
6. Whether people who apologize without using the words “I’m sorry” or “I apologize” really mean it depends on the situation and it turns out I didn’t refer to “Different people process things in different ways” as much as I thought I would but expressions of remorse take different forms. What matters, though, is behavior. Someone who’s genuinely remorseful doesn’t just apologize; they change their behavior.
One of the weird things about the internet is how often we have passing interactions with strangers whom we may never talk to again. I try to remember that people may judge me based on a single comment and that will be how they perceive me from then on. In spite of that I make mistakes and I try to keep in mind that others do too.
Well, this is already absurdly long, but I’d like to end with this illustration of how sometimes even people who mean well can make mistakes.
Thanks for your thoughtfulness in answering those questions. I have to admit that when I read your #5, I looked at my heels and said, “I must protect thee, heels, for time will wound you…and I can’t have that because I’ve got a lot of other shit I need to think about. Thanks so much for the levity, my friend!
I agree that Lilibeth and I process differently…and we’re cool with that (usually.) I tend to overthink and she tends to not let what other people do and say bother her as much. Great observation on your part! But I think you really hit the mark when you wrote about being judged on what you say and do. It’s one thing for someone to read something and misinterpret what you said/wrote…but to then to have the person go off and say/write that (in my case) I said things and meant things that I never did…to falsely attribute unkind things to me…I mean other people out there are reading what she wrote…about me! So let’s say someone who doesn’t know me or her from Adam is hopscotching through the comments section and they read what she wrote but didn’t read what I wrote. They’re going to get an impression about me that is completely bogus. If that reader runs across something in some other comment I write down the road…well, I’m already a leg down if they think that I believe something I don’t and never did. I certainly don’t need that kind of extra silliness in my life. Otherwise I would have ignored the commenter that got me and what I said so wrong. No question, I don’t want to get an unjust and unwarranted reputation for things I don’t believe based upon that one commenter. I mean, yes, I overthink…and that’s one of the things I definitely thought about when I replied that I wasn’t sure why she was saying what she was about me. Where was she getting these untrue thoughts because that’s not what I wrote? I think she was just triggered and made assumptions and never even read anything after she was triggered. She certainly didn’t acknowledge that she misinterpreted what I wrote, she just told me not to take it personally! The cherry? She didn’t apologize either. So I’m trying to use Sarah’s mantra here and decide that she was just stupid/ignorant in what and how she wrote both of her responses, but, perhaps, not malicious. If that’s the case, then I can forgive her. Truly, at this point, what she did is between her and Karma. Hopefully, she does a better job communicating with Karma because I’ve found Karma to be an unforgiving bitch.
On a much lighter note, and again, I thank you for sharing…the link you sent, Chris, was sublime, my friend! Have a great week ahead. I have some catching up to do on your blog. I’ve been reading it, I just haven’t commented yet. I truly loved what you wrote about Columbo and Peter Falk! WE ARE HUGE FANS IN OUR HOUSEHOLD! I’m with you, only Peter Falk can play Columbo. Trying to remake that? Why? Create another character who’s similar but maybe has some different quirks…just don’t try and sell us that this is Columbo because I’m not buying it. Later, Gator! Mona 🙂
The Let-It-Be Tree. That is all.