Seeing Spots

The short of it is this: David doesn’t like leopard print.

Period.

He doesn’t like it in fashion

He doesn’t like it in home decor

He doesn’t like it with his dinner

He doesn’t like it with porn

Okay, that took a strange turn.

I don’t think David likes leopard print even on a leopard. I told him that he probably had a bad experience with someone who was wearing leopard print and was mean to him when he was little (and so he doesn’t remember.) It’s probably just a subconscious thing. He doesn’t know why he doesn’t like leopard, but when he sees it, it makes him feel…annoyed. I told him he should try to get over this.

David, apparently, doesn’t want to get over it. He has preferences, he says. Leopard print is not one of them. And okay, sure. He’s right. But, still…

I think leopard print (any animal print, really, except maybe giraffe print) can look exotic in a classy sense or it can give a sexier impression if one wants to veer toward that look.

I remember my mom loved leopard print back in the late 1960’s and early 1970’s. As much as I’d love to say my mother was always classy (because she usually was), there are still some visuals I have ingrained in my mind’s eye of her back in the day (she would have been in her 20’s) wearing a leopard print blouse, hot pants, and go-go boots. Add to that, her long, fake eyelashes and her bleached blonde hair with dark roots and that’s an image worth remembering. Okay, so in that image, maybe she was sliding a little toward the sexier side — David might even conclude a trashier side. Whatever. But Mom was FUN in her get-up! And I’m perfectly okay with that! You go, Mom! (Huh…I wonder if they allow leopard print in Heaven?)

The fact that Mom liked leopard print doesn’t exactly strengthen my case when encouraging David to embrace his inner Tarzan. Because if Mom liked something, chances are that David would find a reason not to like it, regardless of what it was. (Yeah, they had that kind of relationship.) But that’s okay. Mom wouldn’t have given a shit about whether David approved or not.

I also have a friend who’s incorporated the leopard look here and there into her gorgeous home. She’s always made leopard look classy — never trashy. David agrees that our friend’s home is lovely — except, of course, he doesn’t really like the touches of leopard. *me throwing my hands up and shaking my head in despair*

In our own home, I’ve tried to work animal print into our decor, including a hint of leopard. I’ve also incorporated a little bit into some of my artwork. David doesn’t mind the other animal prints, but he rolls his eyes and says, “Why must you sneak leopard in when you know I don’t like it?” *sigh*

I smile at David because I don’t need to answer that which is already abundantly clear.

The one thing I haven’t done is wear leopard print because…well, again…David. I mean why go out of my way to antagonize him to that degree, right? It’s never been an issue with us before. Throughout our marriage, it’s just been understood that I won’t wear it because he doesn’t like it.

Except, this fall, I’m seeing more and more leopard print in fashion EVERYWHERE! I don’t like everything I see, but there’s a few things that I really kind of do. Soooo…..I may just have to try out a blouse or two with touches of leopard. Unfortunately, because I clicked on these items below in ads, everytime I go online now, they pop up into my field of vision. I hate when ads constantly tease you like that!

Even so, I really like this —

and even if it is a little busy, I’m kind of digging this —

 

If I were thirty years younger, I would definitely wear this —

 

Sorry, but I’m just not into these —

image

I’m seeing another fashion trend this fall as well. I haven’t seen anyone who’s worn anything like this, yet, but…the season’s still early. Even so, I can tell you:

 I won’t be wearing this —

 

Image result for patchwork suits

or this —

 

Related image

or this —

Image result for patchwork suits

Sorry, I just don’t have the confidence to carry those looks off, plus I think if I tried, I’d end up with a screeching headache because I’d feel lopsided and I’d try to over-correct by leaning the entire time I wore any of these. But, hey, if you’re into these new looks…I’m good with that!

Even if I don’t end up buying leopard for myself, though; my daughter’s birthday is coming up. I’ve always enjoyed buying her clothes. And guess what? She looks freakin’ amazing in leopard — and she likes to wear it, too!

You know who else has a birthday coming up? Yep, David.

You think he’d divorce me if I got him these —

ONEFIT Mens Fashion Sexy Leopard Print U Convex Pouch Boxer Brief Underwear
or these
Image result for images of leopard mens underwear

JUST KIDDING! 

bangerooo hot cool wow epic GIF
I’d get him these instead!

Image result for images of leopard mens underwear

 

What about y’all? Is there anything out there right now that you’re just itching to try or that you have a severe aversion to?

TTFN,

Mona

 

35 thoughts on “Seeing Spots”

  1. I hate to agree with anyone’s husband…. but a little leopard print goes a long way for me as well. While I’m not adverse to a scarf or small accessory, animal print can get trashy very quickly. As for the elephant trunk underwear, I have no words!
    🤣

  2. River,
    You’re right, a little leopard print goes a long way! And you do have to be clever with how you use it for it to stay classy. However, my husband hasn’t smiled in about a week. It was a week that was tense and intense and expensive; and the moment he saw the underwear, he broke out into a grin. It didn’t last long, but I’ll take what I can get at the moment! So worth it! Bowchickabowwow! ~ M

  3. Hey Katherine,
    I’m so glad you approve, my friend! I hope you’re doing well and that you are enjoying September, so far! Mona

  4. I love animal prints (Not to wear personally, guys don’t do that), but then again, I also like trashy and am amused “trashy” has such a negative connotation…. though I guess that’s why it was named after garbage in the first place. Find some snow leopard accessories for the winter. Maybe your hubby only has an issue with the color palette of leopard print…

    • ES13,
      Why am I not surprised that you like a little “trashy” here and there? Okay, so do I in just the teeniest, tiniest amounts! Also, as evidenced with the men’s undies above, leopard clearly isn’t just for women anymore! Men can rock leopard. Also, a leopard may never be able to change its spots, but obviously an elephant can! Hahahahaha! Do they make snow leopard print accessories? I had no idea. BTW, snow leopard’s rule! They are amazing cats! Mona

        • Evilsquirrel,
          I checked out your snow leopard, but I really loved the bone accessories! And yes, you have “interesting” models; but then I’d expect nothing less, my friend! Hahaha! Mona

  5. It’s like Victor Victoria is planning a comeback through disjointed blazers! Yuk. The blazers, not V.V. Leopard print, eh? There’s rules on that BTW. How much you can wear, at what age, to what events… as far as 40 being the new 20 and etc… there sure are a lot of rules… which I am to break every damn one of them! Starting with that elephant for MY hubby as well… he has a birthday coming soon too. Hey, we can both celebrate! And good for David! He has preferences. My hubby could care less what I look like… except he didn’t like when I lost 100lbs. ‘Jealousy’ doesn’t look good on anyone! 😉 Besides, why do men get to be more handsome as they age and women don’t? I saw this lady outside my docs office… she was probably late 60s… long story but she was GORGEOUS. Short silver hair, leopard print blouse, black leather jacket, dark blue jeans and ankle boots. Perfect. Stunning. I decided she was my muse. Her name is “Jeanette” Gigi for short. (I totally made it up.) and she has a spectacular life… I made that up too! And I’m going to grow up to be just like her! Your mom sounds like the BOMB! Wowzer! My mom was always put together, she was also very overweight which made her pay even more to her wardrobe I think. She always had her hair done and lipstick on. Everyone loved her, weight didn’t matter. She had her demons but she always shined in public. I’m rambling.

    So leopard. I cant understand how you’ve avoided it? Not even leopard flats? Waaaay back in your closet? Damn! I agree with ES. Go with snow leopard, maybe the palette change wouldn’t bug David. Don’t wear it to spite him. I know you wouldn’t… I would, but don’t. 😂🤣😂

    I’m excited for the end of MANY fashion trends… I couldn’t tell you what’s coming next. I did enjoy this post, however. Please keep me in the fashion loop. If David ever gets over this little issue, get the off the shoulder blouse! It is to die for! I’d be all in. Where can I get a strapless bra?!?! 😂💜

    • Hey Kim,
      When I look at those frankensteined jackets, it makes me think of that DC Villian…was it Two-Face? Yeah. So, no thank you. Rules for leopard print? Who knew? BTW, I don’t think it’s a snow leopard vs. a non-snow leopard thing with David. The point is, while I’m not going to go out of my way to rub leopard in his face, I happen to like a touch of leopard print and so, he’s just going to have to tolerate a little bit from his #1 girl. I love your alter ego/muse, Gigi, who’s sophisticated and cool and edgy; wait a minute…you’re all those things without her! Ha! If I wind up getting myself a little leopard sumpin’ sumpin’, I’ll let y’all know. ~ M

  6. Another fun post! Personally, I like leopard prints. I’ve got a few tops to prove it in fact. I love that third top, the one that is off the shoulder. So cute! But I shy away from those because I’m not willing to either go bra-less or wear a strapless bra. I agree with you on those busy boots and the other items-yuck! Wouldn’t wear them either. But you should totally get the first one, with the leopard print on just the sleeves. Just wear it when you’re out and about sans David!

    • Rhonda,
      I’m so glad you liked this post and two of the tops I picked as well. I probably won’t get the off-the-shoulder top even though that’s my favorite. We’ll see how it goes with what I eventually decide. So glad you’re into leopard, too! ~ M

  7. I like leopard print and like you think it can look classy when done the right way in small amounts. The top with the leopard print sleeves only would be an example. I’m not a fan of plaids, unless they’re a flannel shirt. What I really hate, hate, hate are polka dots. Nothing bugs me quite as much as clothing or home decor with those stupid dots on it.

  8. Oh hey Ally,
    So polka dots make you see red, huh? I’m definitely getting a feel for the intensity of your dislike for them. I’m with you in that they aren’t my favorite pattern; but I don’t hate the dots, polka or otherwise. I’m hard pressed to come up with any pattern, really, that annoys me to the extreme. Hmm. I’ll have to think about that for awhile! 🤔🤨🙃 Mona

    • Andie,
      You’ve got me intrigued…what other things have you seen that you now can’t UNSEE? An address would be all that I need! Ha!
      Mona

  9. I’m laughing. I’d like to see David’s face when you present him with his birthday underpants gift. You ARE going to do it, right? I’m a bit of a practical joker, so I know I would. My guy hates garlic. Not as in “dislikes” it, he HATES it. In any food. And he’s Italian! You have given me a great idea for his birthday gift in December though – a hunking big piece of garlic, wrapped up in beautiful paper.
    Okay, now on to leopard. I don’t like a lot of leopard (have you seen the tight leather leopard pants?). But a friend gave me a soft leopard-looking infinity scarf last Fall, and I absolutely love it. Will be bringing it out in a couple of weeks. And I’ll think of you, and smile.

  10. Pam,
    HE DOESN’T LIKE GARLIC? HE HATES GARLIC????!!!!!!! Is he related to Queen Elizabeth? I’m so sorry to hear that. I’m sure his Italian grandparents are not happy about this. Hell, I’m not happy about this! Do they even make Italian food that doesn’t have garlic in it? I mean, I know they must…still, the Italian meals I love, all have loads and loads of garlic…and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
    Also, do I detect a whiff of a DARE from you? Cuz while I don’t usually accept challenges, in this case, I may just do that! Ha! Okay, you talked me into it. I’ll update everyone at the end of the month. Stay tuned! Mona

  11. At the risk of a virtual slap, I’m with David! I’m a fan on animals, not so much on people. Reminds me of all the cougars (and I mean older women on the prowl, not furry creatures) roaming the ‘burbs:).

    • Hey Kay,
      Welcome to my blog! No slaps, my friend; you are perfectly entitled to side with whomever you like on whatever issue you like at Wayward Sparkles! I’m intrigued! You sound like you live in an interesting neighborhood. We sometimes get bobcats around here and the itinerant coyote; however, I’ve yet to see a cougar of either the four-legged or two-legged variety. Now I kind of want to go cougar sightseeing, though! That would be amazing! Wanna go? Mona

  12. This post made me giggle! Those identity-crisis jackets are… something!

    Like you, I have NOTHING that’s leopard… but I feel like the barrage of leopard print everything these days is wearing me down. It can be cute, once in a while!

    • Hey Suzanne,
      Welcome to Wayward Sparkles! I’m so glad you’re amused. You just came up with the perfect term to describe these jackets! I love that! Yesssss! Okay, you and I need to get a little something leopard just cuz! Sorry, I’ve been ill this past week. Reading at the moment makes me nauseous, so I’ve been neglectful to many of the bloggers I usually check out. I will catch up. I did peek at your blog for just a moment and I’m looking forward to reading more at https://lifeofadoctorswife.wordpress.com/
      Anyway, I’m so glad you found me and hope you visit often! Mona

  13. So guess what. I’d totally wear that black and white identity crisis jacket. I’m a little sad that the first image didn’t load for me.
    I also enjoy the cougar feeling of leopard print. I like loud, ugly, lopsided things. I have a black and white leopard print collared button down. It just might be the classiest thing I own… unfortunately. Sometimes I pick out a pair of shoes and show it to my sisters and say, aren’t these kind of… and they break in with THOSE ARE SO UGLY and I have to put them back because they clearly see something I don’t see, hahaha.
    Even I don’t understand my sense of fashion. Somewhere between eco-hippie, punk, senorita, ninja, dom, Victorian picnic, and FML.

    • Sarah,

      I have no doubt that you’d rock that jacket! If anyone could pull that look off, it would be you, my friend! (And I mean that in nothing but a good way!) If you wear something like it, btw, you should wear a hat to go with it. Maybe a top hat? I dunno. As to the other jacket…IKR? The image won’t pull up on my phone, but it will on my PC. What else is new! Sorry about that. BTW, when we met in July, there was not one thing you wore the entire weekend that I’d describe as ugly. Also, you were classy…well, except for that new trend with the underwear, thing…but we won’t bring that up again! It was a look though. Ha! For Me? It’s always comfort first! Mona

    • Hey CG, I’m with you! I’m taking my trashy back just like a virgin, touched for the very first time. Hungry and mean! Suburbanites, watch my leopard swish walk away, talk to the hand and hear mama ROAR! Chomp, chomp! La, la, la! 😎 Mona

  14. I like leopard print mainly in shoes, but it can be done in a classy was in fashion as you mentioned. What’s up with David not liking it? Those last man-fashions are hilarious! 🤣

  15. Hey Huntress,
    Welcome to Wayward Sparkles! Yeah, David’s gonna have to deal cuz I’m going shopping this weekend and I’m hellbent on finding something leopard! The elephant’s my favorite but he told me he’d throw them out if I got them for him! I believe he said, “Capital N, capital O, preceded by HELL!”
    LOL. Mona

  16. The elephant underwear reminds me of a similar pair of Santa Clause ones a GF in my 30’s got me. I still have them stuffed away in a drawer somewhere. I won’t elaborate further here, but you may have inspired me to write a post about it on my own blog. Thanks!

    • Hey Arionis,
      Welcome to Wayward Sparkles. That sounds like something I’d be interested in reading and I’m so glad I inspired you! I can’t wait to check out your eleph, er…uhm…blog! LOL. Anyway, I hope you visit often! Mona

  17. I can’t do the neon thing again. Or the fanny pack. It was good until it wasn’t. Does anyone really look good in neon anything? I will wear leopard all day and wore my leopard blouse to a dinner party last week and I felt great.

    • Hey Kristine,
      Isn’t it funny how fashion comes and goes? Is it wrong that I sometimes miss my fanny pack? I predict neon leopard print in the future! LOL. Mona

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